This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
