I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize