So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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