suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
