I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize