please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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