I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
