I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
