can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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