I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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