He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
