no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
