your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
