Having a random hookup so left but love u
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize