Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Boobs speak an international language.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Randomize
