drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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