i just made my gag reflex go away.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
My life is pants optional.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
