grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
