i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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