They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I enjoy the company of your penis
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