It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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