You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
