how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Randomize