Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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