I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
My vagina just clenched in fear
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