I molested 6 butterflies tonight
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
