i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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