You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
