Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize