My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize