When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
