in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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