Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
