She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
