Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
