bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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