found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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