I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Randomize
