reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
