guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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