I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Randomize
