How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
