I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Did you just see the Batmobile???
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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