Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
