why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
my nose is crying tears of wow.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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