How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
