Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
