it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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