He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Randomize
