the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
